Finding a voice, or an accurate way to write out and depict your 'inner voice', can be hard, daunting, confusing and overwhelming. In a sea of witty, comical, kitschy, trendy, smart and provocative women being the 'little guy' just starting out sometimes feels like a deer-in-headlights. That might just be my inner pessimist trying to crush the positivity I do feel for self-growth and development.  However, it does lead me to the bigger questions tied to blogging such as "why do I want to do this", "what is my goal", and “what do I want to showcase and develop?" 

                I've thought and tested out bits and pieces of my writing and varying styles of it in older blog posts and while I do really love to write creatively and lean on the side of poetic, overall it isn't something that really grasps my own attention! I want something I enjoy coming back to on a consistent and regular basis. I want something I feel very akin to that relates and reflects who I am with a more “IRL” voice.  Perhaps a mix between the ways I use professionalism and knowledge when speaking at work and how I articulate myself in my creative writing would be a better way to show how I am outside of the internet.  And Hey! It would at the very least, I believe, help me to become a better communicator in person. Lord knows I could use some TLC in that area.

                Ultimately that’s what I've really wanted from blogging, a wonderful community to grow with and learn from. To become the best version of me and document that self-leadership development through the things I love. 

Giveaway!

Stephmodo has an amazing giveaway over on her blog

http://www.stephmodo.com/2012/11/la-maisonnette-france-giveaway.html

Kendra Dee

Keeping Up

Extraordinary the way feeling
focused can help adjust life.
Having a track for the mind to
ride along.

In developing focus
drive returns, motivation starts
to evolve and find anew.
Small tasks and to do's
become easier, less daunting.

Photo: Pinterest via
hepburns-Audrey.tumblr.com

Silent Giants

It's unreal to be among the quiet creeping forests.
Trees who tower above me and engulf me.
I felt protected beneath them.

We were cut off from everything, practically.
Alone with each other and our own company
we camped in the wilderness and explored the
mountains, the sea, the trees and ancient lakes.

I have a new love and appreciation for camping.
It was such a wonderful experience and it reminded me
so much of summer camp as a kid.
Chris and I started planning all sorts of trips for next year
because of this one. We explored Crater Lake in Oregon and
The Redwood National Forest in California.

Escape

Seattle.

The timeless neighborhoods

are inspiring me with how

I want my home to look.

Being a tourist for a day.

Visiting museums 

and eating at Pike Place Market.

Looking out onto the bay

escaping into enchantment.

Drinking absinthe infused cocktails

until late into the night.

I've been pinning ideas

for when Chris and I have a house

next year.

And I cannot wait to fill it

with warmth and art

and love.

Into the mountains

Two hours into the woods
the air was hot and dry
as we basked
disconnected from everything.

I love camping. That brief, grungy
vacation.
High into the cascades with
towering foothills that engulfed us.
Long nights and brisk early mornings
where we were woken by the sunrise
coming over the mountains.

A time to just connect with
friends, the outdoors.
Stay-away-cation.
Away from everything distracting and stressful.

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Trying to find a balance, trying to build a balance.

I've definitely lost touch with the things I love.
It's east though, right?
Where you're too "busy" doing everything else
and not making time for spending time
with yourself.

Is it will power to dedicate time
for the things you love and lost?
Or pure laziness for growing out
of them.

An "attempt" isn't doing.
Failing is okay however. It lets
us know we can always get
better and it gives us room to grow,
to learn a better you.

It's easy to throw all of
my energy
into the things I have to.
A very serious full time job
that I love deeply.
I don't allow myself room
for myself
outside of work
outside of love.

I admit,
I have a lot of room to grow.
To learn.

Upkeep

I've been trying for a long time to keep up on this and get it going. I think the biggest issue I face is that I have a hard time keeping interest in things, for example I have no real hobbies, I moved back home and all I seem to have time for is work and sleep. How sad! There are so many wonderful blogs I read and it is such a fascinating community and phenomenon to have people connecting all over the world in a very real and family bond way. It is something I have always wanted to do for myself as a way to keep up on commitments outside of my job and have an outlet for finding and staying with things I love or have a curiosity for.

I think another thing I struggle with is giving myself personal time. I have no problem with rules, boundaries and guidelines when I am required to by my job and my personal relationships but as far as doing things for myself, I have some crazy mental block! This year I made a list of goals for myself that are very real and obtainable to push and challenge me for me. This getting started is a big part of it and will be a big part of keeping track of how I am doing in all this “self-discovery” or “re-discovery” of sorts.

I am really excited to see where this all takes me. Whether anyone or no one reads this, it is ultimately for me.

 (source: pinterest)